Vertically-challenged

“Oy *bleep* next time don’t say you’re small ha? Just say you’re vertically-challenged”
                                    -Von Arroyo to me during our Eye Contact-cum-Voice Communication II session last night
“I tried teaching kids and I’ll never do it again. Wala kaming ginawa kung ‘di mag-drawing. Kaya siguro hindi ako ginawang straight para hindi ako magkaanak” (or was it manganak?)
-Von Arroyo [...]

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Quotes from the Inbox 5 (boss na galit sa mundo [at mga nanay] edition)

This was my boss’s reply when I greeted her last Mother’s Day:
“sori to sagot ko s rcv kong greets_Pnapa abolish ko madrs day lahat ng kapalpakan pinas t mundo may kasalanan mga gagang ina. Ano gnawa nanay n posporo petchay joe d vnecia george bush gloria mac? Ano gnawa s kanila nagng ganyan cla? Napakasama [...]

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Quotes from the Inbox 4 (stalker edition)

Oh yes, ang susunod na nakakalokang inbox quote ay nagmula sa isang “harmless” na stalker (Lord, sana nga harmless sya…).
Umm, wwWWwwWwWwww, probably if one wd go crazy fr it a many wd go crazy too n i’d be damned f it, pero am sure am not t ignore a face n everythin on it or an [...]

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Primetime bida

“Wag k n nga sabi magrely sa mga ganyan ganyan! Hindi k primetime bida, ok?”
-ito ang tinext ko sa isang kaibigan matapos niya ‘kong itext nang ganito:
“tignan mo, relate talaga ko kay anne sa maging sino ka man!”
-I guess gets nyo na kung ano ang istorya ng buhay niya…yun eh kung avid follower din kayo ng [...]

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Custom Message

Galing sa custom message ng isa nating KaQuote. Aamin ‘to sooner or later na s’ya ang ‘nagsabi’ (kasi magiging proud pa s’ya) so hindi na kailangan pa ng clues.
Dame sinasabi, may limitasyon lahat ng bagay, namumuro ka na sa akin!
San ka pa? Ang taray! Sino kaya ang namumuro sa kanya? At ano naman kaya ang [...]

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Si Kalimot

A woman was on her way to an important event, where she would have a speaking part. On her way out of the house, she was mentally recounting all the stuff she was likely to forget. Her maid was in tow, silently nodding as if to tick her verbal checklist.  True enough, she did forget something.
“Ay, ano [...]

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Just Shop Nga Eh

Sosyalera Girl: What’s “Just Shop?”
Other Girl: It’s a thin insert in PDI every Sunday.
Sosyalera Girl: It’s about shops?

Ugh.
For those of you who doesn’t read the Inquirer, kahit Sundays lang, Just Shop is a thin glossy magazine inserted at the PDI Sunday Editio, which features fashion and other knick-knacks in spreads. So yeah, in a way, [...]

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Favorite Killer

Walang basagan ng favorite!
My friend lametably uttered the words as I confidently predict Filipinos probably denying his Pinoy Big Brother favorite “Mickey” the title of “Big Winner.” And to amount to that, I would wear a very evil smile while I pinpoint who’s going and who’s staying. My secret? I would usually place my [...]

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